Dear Nelly,
Is it not the norm or possibly not in favor of Hollywood's image for I always seem to think the BEFORE image is usually more attractive then the AFTER?You are wondering what the hell I'm talking about?I write about all these diet commercials!I believe the before pictures are usually better and though I get tired of all those types of commercials,I can't seem to turn the channel.I just think people are too caught up with self image.People don't need others to tell them if they are healthy or not.
I probably don't need to say this,but I will and since I try to express myself fully,it won't be in one sentence.
Being "imprisoned" has always made me look to HUMANIZE myself to the outside world.Even if one does not make me feel less,I still try to point out that my crime does not define who I am.Also,I wrote to Mr.Thieben for close to 20 years before I asked him anything about his personal life.
It isn't that I'm afraid,but I guess I feel so privileged to have persons within my life such as Mr.Thieben,Father Frank,David,and Linda that I don't ask too many personal questions because I'm AFRAID to lose the friendships.I'd have to exclude David & Linda for I do know about their families for they opened that part of their lives to me.
I can't think for Nelly(you)so I only guess,assume,wonder,etc. if it is right/wrong,normal/abnormal,etc. for me to ask about your life beyond your laboratory/research?I know I must step outside of my identity as a convict dealing with our friendship for in here it is OUR duty to learn as much as we can about those around us to survive.I don't want to believe I lost my social skills,but most of my socializing has been as an inmate in maximum security prisons.
I suppose I always thought about-I don't put it in a question for I don't know if there is a simple answer-what leads persons to be so genuine and considerate such as YOU,Mr.Thieben,Father Frank,David,and Linda?People like you are what drives me to be a better person and NEVER to view the world as an ugly place.You know how you have people with the mind set,it's me against the world?A lot of prisoners feel this way and I always try to point out to them how many genuine people there are in this world.
It is extra special to a man/woman in prison and my appreciations for persons such as you go so deep that I'd never turn down ANY request you asked of me.It isn't a submissive or obedient mind frame,it is an extension of my appreciations that could never be shown except via that statement up above(2 lines up).It is the truth and unless one spent time in a prison cell,they will never know what it means to have HOPE for it is what keeps me alive.
The reason I enclosed the letter from Father Frank is to show you that I even keep in touch with a former correction officer.He retired years ago,but he worked there when I was first arrested.I was on his gallery and I guess from just normal conversation he has kept in touch with me via Father Frank & Mr.Thieben.He is a security guard at the college they teach at and they are all friends.Anyway,it is people like all of you that keep everything in focus and to know it's not me against the world.
I try to point it out in most of my letters to you and you don't even need to respond to it,but I truly thank you and appreciate all that you have done for me.It really means a lot to me.
Most of the leaves have fallen off the trees outside my window,but I really can't see much further into the trees for there are just too many trees out there.
Well,I'll close for now and until the next time,take good care.
James
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